What I Got Wrong In 2018

Happy start to the new year!! It’s hard to believe that it is a week into 2019, but here we are. The past month has been a heavily reflective one in my areas that compile into my life. It is amazing to see what a difference one year can make. 2018 was good, but hard. I felt lost and confused and unstructured. Personally, I need structure, plans, and lists to feel secure in life. My personality type is one that thrives in constant improvement, so with that I need to visually and mentally go through each area of my life to see if I’m improving, staying stagnant, or going backwards.

So, looking back on 2018 there was a lot I was lacking because it was the first year out of the education system. The education system is like my safety blanket because its structured in a way that my mind gets and loves. It was hard to adjust to life outside of class learning, but slowly I realized I was now able to take this new free time outside of working, and use it for immersing myself in the things I love. So with all that said, here are the things I got wrong in 2018 that need improvement.

Be A Smart Hustler

While in many sense hustling is good, I took it too an unhealthy measure. There is a way to be a smart hustler and a way to be a mental break down every day hustler. 2018 was my first year out of college and I was lost like most everyone else that comes out of the safety of the education world. My safety blanket was pulled out from under me and there I went flying into the abyss of not knowing where my life was going, who I was, and where to even begin. But instead of sitting down to process all that, I decided to work myself to the max. I wanted to start saving up money, paying off student loans, and working on my career path. Which while they are great things to strive for, I was not doing them in a healthy manner. I was working up to 65 hours a week between 2 jobs. One I loved and one I hateeeeeeeeeeeed. nay…Loathed. But I stuck with it for 8 months until I realized I could work at a place that I LOVED and still be financially okay. So by the time December rolled around I was working an average of 42 hours a week at a place I love, along with doing some side hustles that are creatively fulfilling.

Learn To Be Okay With Not Knowing

Not knowing where life was going to go was hard for me to swallow. I had just spent my entire life in the education world that felt safe, predictable, and established. It’s hard to process such a big change and for the first 6 months of 2018 I was pretty down. I was anxious, unhappy, and on edge all at once. Like my body was trying to move forward with life but my heart was frozen with fear of the unknown. Eventually I made necessary changes, but for a long time I was lost.

Make Your Health A Priority

Another thing I got way wrong was my health. Mentally and physically I was a wreck. My body hurt all the time, my minds constantly doubting everything, and not to forget the good ole breakdowns of “What am I doing with my life.” One day I realized I had become numb to feeling anything, and I needed to change. So I decided to sign up for boxing classes, slow down in life, and take a step back from creating and working so much. The boxing classes have been the best addition to my life by FAR. My body feels incredible and healthy, it’s made me want to nourish myself with more whole foods, it’s given me confidence, and helped my life feel more structured. Boxing has taught me how to face difficulty with your hands up ready to fight while still having a blast. I’ve slowed down life by waking up earlier and laying in bed for a few minutes to gently wake up my mind and body. I’ve slowed down by not working as much and making more time for friends and family. I took a step back from painting, learning music, and writing so I could refill myself with creativity and life again. Having made all these additons and subtractions in my life has made an incredible difference and I finally feel like I’m back to who I am.

Going Back To God

With how up in the air my life was in 2018, I somehow left God behind. While my love for Him never went away, my feeling of His presence started fading and I stopped making Him the priority in my life. I kept praying to get out of the rut, bu never spent time with Him to be filled. One day I finally snapped out of it and decided to actually put actions to my prayers and pursue Him again. I listened to the Bible Project Podcasts almost every morning, I started talking to Him more throughout the day, I looked for Him more intently in everyday life, and I stopped making excuses. My main goal and priority for 2019 is to get to know Him better and our story.

In Conclusion

All in all, I learned that for this next year I need to actually take 2 days off a week to recharge, be with family, be with friends, pursue my creative passions, and pursue God. Currently, I am on a strong path to Living a life that is Happily Inked by God’s love. And boy…. I am so excited to see where this new energy and path is going!!!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s